It’s the sixth day of January already. If you’re like me, then you must have set some goals for 2023. Some of you may have already given up on your goals and some of you may already feel burned out. There is immense pressure to achieve these goals.

According to some experts, one must set goals instead of setting a resolution. The problem with resolutions is that they are quite arbitrary and follow no plan. Goals, on the other hand, require a plan. Without a plan, we find no direction for our work.

Most people set resolutions without any plans which ultimately leads to failure. They put so much pressure on themselves to achieve those goals that they end up pushing themselves too hard. It can cause burnout and you get frustrated, causing you to give up and fall back on the same pattern. You end up feeling like you cannot achieve these goals and you stop trying.

By the end of January, most people give up on the goals they set on achieving.

The key is to not give up. Never put too much pressure on yourself. Building a habit takes time. You must have heard that it takes 21 days to form a habit. However, new research shows that it takes 66 days to build a habit. It is a long time, and it is guaranteed there will be some days when you fail.

Let’s say you want to build a habit of exercising every day. You wake up every day and try and get some exercise for 30 minutes. Life gets in the way, and you may not get time to exercise for a few days. Or some days you push yourself so hard that you may experience soreness the next day, and you do not find the energy to exercise the next two days. It can be a setback.

The good news is that a year consists of 365 days. So you will get many chances to build a new habit. Even if you fail the first time around, the important thing is that you never give up. Keep trying until you get through the first 66 days. Then follow through until it becomes natural to you.

How should you set goals?

Setting goals requires planning. Every goal of yours should meet the following criteria for you to achieve it:

Your goals should be specific

Never set goals that are vague. Set very specific goals. Instead of setting a goal that you want to save money, set a goal that you will save Rs. 20,000 every month. By the end of the year, you will end up saving Rs. 2,40,000. Also, make sure you set a limited number of goals. Do not overburden yourself. At most, try and set only three goals every year. 

Be realistic

Remember to set goals that are realistic. If you earn Rs. 25,000 every month then don’t try and save Rs. 20,000. Evaluate your expenditures and set a goal accordingly. You will be able to save Rs. 5,000-10,000 depending upon your budget and expenses. Even if you’re trying to lose weight, don’t expect to lose 10 kgs in 2 months. That way you will only end up overburdening yourself and probably starving yourself. 

Make sure you have deadlines

Do not be ambiguous with the dates. Make sure to give yourself a deadline. If you want to lose weight, then set a goal like ‘drop 8 kgs till June 2023’. Having a deadline will motivate you to achieve it. You can also break it into shorter goals like ‘drop 1.5 kgs every month.’ 

Write your goal, and have an action plan

I’ve found out that writing down your goals in a diary will help you more than typing them in your digital journal. There is something about writing stuff down on pen and paper that makes it more real. Don’t just jot down your goals, but write out a plan about how exactly, you’re going to achieve them. 

Setting Goals for 2023

The first thing to do while setting up a goal for the new year is to retrospect. Evaluate where you’re lacking, and what can you do to make any aspect of your life better. Some goals are personal while others can benefit your professional life. It is advisable to take on one goal at a time instead of trying to achieve all your goals at the same time. Or you can select two goals that complement each other. 

Personal anecdote time. I have set three goals for 2023. Since 2016, my goal has always been to lose weight and I failed every time. Not only that, but it also led to some pretty serious issues where I developed some kind of an eating disorder. This year I restructured that resolution, and I’m only focusing on exercising and improving my overall fitness.

To help you set goals, you should evaluate every aspect of your life. A mind map or free writing will help you do the same. If you find that you lack self-confidence, then you can come up with actionable steps you can take to gain self-confidence. The key is to know the cause of it. If it is a lack of proper conversational skills, then set aside 20 minutes of the day to stand in front of a mirror and practice your speaking skills. If you feel like you need to develop a new skill to exceed in your professional workspace, then pick up that skill and practice every day for an hour. 

So this year, instead of pushing myself to do strenuous exercises and eat less, I have made it my goal to practice yoga and hit 10k steps every day. These fitness goals are achievable for me. My other goal is to grow my blog and get into making video content. That being said, I feel uncomfortable in front of the camera and do not have the best oratory skills. So there is a learning curve to my goals in 2023. My last goal is to write a book in 2023, but I’m only focusing on the first two goals at the moment.

Setting goals is easy. Achieving them is difficult. The truth is, it requires discipline, consistency and handwork. Staying motivated is hard when you’re feeling like you’re failing every time. 

How to Stay Motivated?

Motivation is very subjective. Everyone gets motivated by different things. You have to figure out what motivates you.

Before you set a goal, you need to understand why you are setting the goal. It is important to understand the motivation behind the goal. So anytime you begin to feel fatigued and unmotivated, you need to go back to your answer. Don’t think that you are losing weight just to fit into some social standard and to get good Instagram pictures. That sort of motivation will not sustain you. It has to be for you. Lose weight to feel better and get more energy to achieve other goals. It will boost your self-confidence and help you achieve a better quality of life. 

Breaking your goals down into smaller chunks will also motivate you and help you stay accountable. If you want to curb your shopping addiction, then do it a few days at a time. Promise yourself that you won’t buy anything for a month. When you end up not spending for a month, it will motivate you to achieve more. 

Give yourself small incentives. If you are planning to embark upon a fitness journey, then reward yourself for exercising for a week or a month. You can buy yourself something pretty, or even buy some sports gear that will further motivate you. 

Some people work harder towards their goals when they hold themselves accountable. You can share your goal with a trusted friend or your family, so they hold you accountable for that. Ask him to check on your progress from time to time. That can be your motivation. However, make sure that friend or family member is someone you trust. Some people demotivate you and it’s best not to share your plans with them. You can also get a buddy who is trying to achieve the same thing as you. That way you can both hold each other accountable. External motivation is important when you run low on internal motivation. 

Reaching Your 2023 Goals

It is important to remember that failure is a part of life. Failure is the tool that leads to success. So allow yourself to fail. You’re human, after all. 

Life gets in the way, and there will be days when you do not feel like doing anything. It is okay to take a few days off. Remember not to push yourself too hard. 

All you need to do is keep a plan ready. Invest your time accordingly. Do not let anyone tell you that it is a waste of time. If you are like me, then keep a journal handy. Write about your progress and all the challenges you are facing. Then work towards mitigating those challenges. It will give you a clear perspective on your goals. Make them a challenge, and just have fun with it!